Great Canadian “Archives Canada” Fake, 1900

We’ve just found the oldest version of Canada’s most famous battlefield photo, published, by the Graphic, on Feb. 14, 1900, only seven weeks after it was taken.

It proves conclusively, what we’ve maintained all along, that Canada’s most famous “combat” picture is a fake, in more ways than one…

And Archives Canada should stop selling it, and publishing it, as if it was some kind of “Great Canadian Heritage Moment,” instead of a typical cheesy Hollywood fake that it is…

I give up. Show me the Hodgson-Miller Fake

Posted in Antiques, Fakes & Frauds, History, Media Madness, Military Madness, Political Madness | Leave a comment

Great Canadian Election Memorabilia, 2011

With Canadians in the middle of a hot election campaign in April, 2011, the cunning Conservatives are handing out this “twofer” patriotic pisspot, to its core group of mostly rural voters, as a free gift for showing up at Steve Harper rallies. They get, not only a fine memento of their glorious leader, but also, a handy appliance for mom and pop when it’s just too awkward to go out to the outdoor privy on those cold winter nights. (ed. note, for foreign readers: Most of Harper’s voters come from the more backward regions of Canada, e.g. “the sticks” in Ontario, the Prairies, and downtown Calgary.)

This fabulous “thunder mug” features an angelic portrait of “El Maximo Leader” gazing soulfully upward, wondering whose rural ass he’s going to have to kiss next to get elected… It will certainly be a valuable collectible in years to come.

Conservative Prime Minister Harper and his wife Laureen smile solicitously at a typical Conservative voter on whose support they depend, though she's more interested in "being on TV" than discussing politics with a guy wearing "geeky" glasses, and some woman she's never heard of except at election time...

We last met Laureen when Harper sent her his famous “Letter to Laureen” AKA “I skipped to the Loo My Darling” because of his famous turn on the world stage at the G8 and G20 summits.  Go to the Loo, My Darling.

Though apparently most popular in rural Ontario and Saskatchewan, the Patriotic Pisspots – or the PPs, as they are cheekily referred to, by insiders at the PMO – are reportedly also being eagerly snapped up in urban areas of Alberta where they are being put to good use in downtown Calgary by university profs and their wives in their SUVs, and by Redneck Yahoos in pick-up trucks. Or is it the other way around…? Ahh, it doesn’t really matter, in Harper country; you can arrange the words any way you like, and they still fit…

This fine Patriotic Pisspot is made by the same contractor that earlier had produced the now hard to find, fabulous “Threefer” Patriotic Pisspots for Harper’s favourite general Rick “the Killer” Hillier.

These now fetch astronomic amounts we’re informed, but just can’t be found for love or money, at any price.

Show me General Hillier’s ingenious Patriotic Threefer Pisspot designed to catch Bin Laden 

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Coyote or Wolf Attacks on Humans

Bonjour,

Mon ami demeure à Ste-Claire, comté de Dorchester, il a deux jeunes enfants, aujourd’hui comme vous voyez sur les photos il y avait soit un loup ou coyote sur son terrain, est-ce dangereux?

Merci de me répondre.

Danielle Chouinard

Allo,
Oui, c’est dangereux.
Particulièrement quand les animaux n’ont pas peur des humains. Peut être ils sont malades avec rage.
Pour éviter une tragédie alerter les autorités – la police et les autorités de la faune.
A Toronto, pleusieurs fois, les coyotes ont pris un petit chien derrière les maisons à coté de terrains sauvages.
En 2009, les coyotes ont tué une jenue femme, a dix-neuve ans, à Nouvelle Écosse. Un petit enfant était tué, aussi, à California. Plus d’autres sont blessées.
La même chose, en  d’autres lieux du Canada, les coyotes et cougars ont attaquée les petits enfants, quand ils sont seuls, dehors de leurs maisons. Et la même chose pour les loups.
Si votre maison – et vos enfants – sont près des loups, coyotes, ou cougars, à l’état sauvage – ça ne fait rien celui qui – gardez vos enfants, quand ils jouent dehors. Et votre chats, et chiens… si vous les aimez…
Mais seulement si les animaux sauvage ont faim…
Ou sont fou… ou désarroi… ou…
Et n’oubliez pas l’animal sauvage, le plus dangereux de tous, le chien inconnu, de votre ami. Ils ont tué plus d’enfants que tous les autres animaux ensemble…
(Pardonnez notre français.)
Grace à Coming Back Alive

Réponse:
Merci infiniment pour votre réponse, je transfert le tout à mon ami!
Donc c’est un coyote? Il a attrapé chez lui une marmotte hier et il me disait qu’il n’était pas du tout nerveux ou peureux…il marchait le long de la rivière…
Avec deux jeunes enfants 3-5 ans, je comprends qu’il soit nerveux…
Vous êtes vraiment gentil de me répondre ainsi dans un délai aussi court
Bonne dimanche
Danielle

Children, Coyotes, Wolves, Bears & Cougars – A common question from people living in rural areas where their young children play outside near where wild animals come close to houses.

“My neighbour lives near the bush. A coyote or a wolf comes close and has no fear. Yesterday it killed a groundhog quite close by. She has a three, and a five year old. Is it safe to let them play outside alone?”

It doesn’t matter if the animal is a coyote, wolf, cougar, or bear. Wild animals must always be treated as wild – especially when they act tame… They show no fear because they are starving and may be considering trying a human as a menu item… Or have rabies, and so are doubly dangerous: you may either be killed or infected with a deadly disease.

Cougars, and coyotes commonly attack and kill house pets – dogs and cats – in both rural and urban areas all over North America. The danger is increasing as both coyotes and cougars are extending their range especially into more urban areas.

Cougars and coyotes have killed humans in Canada, as recently as 2009, when a 19 year old woman was killed by coyotes in Nova Scotia. A child was killed in California in 1981. Countless children and adults have been severly wounded, by coyotes, wolves, cougars, and bears, that came too close… and seemed friendly, and harmless enough…

Rabid Dog

Children are especially vulnerable because they are “good meal sized,” and defenceless, when left outside, and available, by their busy parents.

And remember, the most dangerous wild animal of all, is the dog – your neighbour’s, a colleague’s, or a stray, that your child encounters when you’re not watching.

House dogs kill more children, by far, than all the cougars, wolves, coyotes, and bears combined…

Go to Coming Back Alive

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First Battlefield Use of a Wristwatch, 1900

The first events in history, recorded with a wristwatch, by Canadian Lt. James Mason, on Bloody Sunday, Feb. 18, 1900, at Paardeberg, South Africa.

James must have had nerves of steel knowing that help could not reach him till long after dark. In the end he had to save himself. Many others bled to death on that day.

Go to Cool Guy checking his watch while he falls in the bloodiest battle of the Boer War.

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First Briton Ever Shown Wearing a Wrist Watch, 1900?

Absolutely rare is this cabinet card, which might be the first photograph showing a Briton wearing a wristwatch, or wristlet, as it was known.

Men on civvy street refused to wear them because they were then almost exclusively worn by women as decorative items.

Real men wore pocket watches on a chain attached to a button hole, thank you.

But wristlets caught on among military men, during the Boer War, alas, we believe, also as a fashion statement, in keeping with their self-importance as efficient soldiers.

We have now found FOUR historic firsts regarding the wearing of certifiable wrist watches on the first soldiers in history… We challenge you to find earlier ones…

OK, show me the First Soldier ever – a Canadian in 1899 – to be shown wearing a wristwatch.

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